The Psychology of The Closet and the Benefits of Coming Out

Lindsay Cooper suggests that "coming out [of the closest] is far more complex than simply announcing one's sexual orientation to anyone who will listen" (2008, p. 428). Indeed, the process can be fraught with unbearable stress and severe depression. It takes years, even decades, of preparation. At the core of all of it is some very interesting psychology.

This "closet" that people hide their sexuality in can serve dual functions. One function is as a shelter to protect oneself from the torrent of prejudice and discrimination, and another is as a box for which to hide the shame one feels when they have internalized the homophobia around them (Chekola, as cited in Cooper). Cooper notes (with help from Sedwick) that those who are lesbian, gay or bisexual (LGB) and open about their relationships are accused of "flaunting" their sexuality. In the workplace, most people wouldn't bat an eye if they overheard a heterosexual coworker discussing last night's date with their friends, at least as long as it was not too explicit. LGB, however, often do not have this luxury. From personal observation, there still seems to be a large population that would consider anything relating to LGB behavior as explicit. If that population includes the coworkers, friends, teachers, or parents of someone who is LGB, they might internalize those beliefs, and hide what is pushed out by it into the closet. 

Now, if the closest is so safe, why do people care to come out of it in the first place? Cooper, citing a 1995 study by Rhoads, lists some of the benefits of coming out as having an "improved sense of self, increased openness and more self-confidence" and being "less afraid, more open, happy and relieved" (p. 429). I would suggest that these benefits are not merely a result of no longer having a secret, or finally feeling you can be yourself. I am of the belief that sexual identity does not necessarily equal personal identity, but in the case of a "closeted" LGB, I would imagine that it is very closely tied. Hidden within, their true sexual identities follow them everyday, threatening to reveal itself through their actions or words and the astute observations of others. They would have to be conscious of their behavior in every social encounter, which would therefore affect many of the characteristics associated with their personal identity. 

Furthermore, the act of coming out could be viewed as a transformation from a state of objective self-awareness to a subjective one; a transformation from me to I. If we are in a state of objective-awareness, we are focused on how we are being perceived by others. In this state, we would be constantly, and consciously, evaluating the inferred evaluations of those around us. In contrast, when we take a state of subjective self-awareness, our focus is outside of ourselves. In this state, we our interacting with the world, rather than the ones being interacted with (Heine, 2012). I like to think of it like this: in a subjective state we are a who; in an objective state we are a what.

This concept has major cultural implications, however, as Americans typically identify with a state of subjective self-awareness (Kim, Cohen, & Au as cited in Heine, 2012). Therefore, there is a major conflict if an LGB identifies with the American culture and their being in the closet triggers a state of objective self-awareness. The theory of cognitive dissonance theory proposes that "people have a fundamental motivation to maintain consistency among elements in the cognitive systems" (VandenBos, 2007, p. 189). If one thought or behavior is inconsistent with another thought or behavior, distress can occur. In order to reduce this distress, something has to changer. In the case of LGB in a subjective self-awareness leaning culture, being in the closest creates distress because a thought (I am a who; I am in charge of my own life; I don't care what others think) is inconsistent with a behavior (hiding their sexuality for fear of how others will react). A person in this situation has a few choices. They could deny their sexual orientation and internalize the homophobia. They can seek conversion therapy (which is not advisable). Or they can come out of the closet.

Simply put, the closet is full of more than a fabulous wardrobe. The amount of applicable psychological concepts hanging up in there is staggering. It helps to explain why LGB youth are 4 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual peers (CDC, as cited in The Trevor Project). LGB that reveal their sexual orientation to the world have a difficult road ahead of them for sure, but the struggle may be well worth it. 

References

-Cooper, L. (2008). On the other side: Supporting sexual minority students. British Journal of Guidance Counseling, 36(4), 425-440.

-Hiene, S. J. (2012). Cultural Psychology. New York: W. W. Norton and Company, Inc.

-The Trevor Project. (2014). Facts about suicide. Retrieved from http://www.thetrevorproject.org/pages/facts-about-suicide

-VandenBos, G. R. (Ed.). (2007). APA Dictionary of Psychology. Washington D.C.: American Psychological Association.