Why Is Gender Necessary?

Recently I (a male) was with a female friend at a bar in downtown Anchorage. I went up to order two drinks while she waited at the table. I ordered a Vodka-Cranberry (VC) and a Whiskey and Coke (WC). Based off of the information I just gave you, can you guess which one of us got which drink? If you think of a VC as a girl drink (i.e. a drink in which the alcohol is relatively unnoticeable) and a WH  as a guy drink (i.e. a hard drink) you might assume that I got the WC and my friend the VC. The server (who was a female) thought the same thing. She set the WH in front of me and the VC in front of my friend. When my friend and I gave each other a funny look, the server asked, "Did I get that right?"

This isn't the first time that's happened. Once, a server brought me my VC with whipped cream on top. It was actually really good with whipped cream, but I've been too embarrassed to ask for it again.

Because of situations like this (and many others), I've always been interested in gender roles and stereotypes. Lehmiller defines gender as "a psychosocial term that encapsulates all of the psychological, cultural, and social characteristics we think of as belong to men and woman" (2014, p. 117). The keyword for me here is think. Unlike the term sex, which is biologically determined, gender is determined by society. Gender is just what we think gender is.

This makes me curious why we have gender at all. Beyond the physical and chemical difference between male and females, why do we have to set standards for specific characteristics? Why can't we just.. well, just be? Where does this concept of gender originate?

Cohen (as cited in in Hiene, 2012) explains that gender roles can be attributed to the ecological environment in which a culture lives. In a more harsh environment where food is difficult to come by (such as mountain terrain or deep sea fishing), cultures are likely to value strength and masculinity. In cultures that live in a more gentler environment where food is easy to get (such as an abundance of fruit and shore fishing), cultures are less likely to value masculinity; male and female gender roles are likely to be very similar.

This makes great sense, but then the question becomes, we does 21st century America have gender roles? The mainstream culture shops at supermarkets. Gender roles are equalizing as more women take roles outside of the home, but there are still stereotypes of what men and woman should be.

Like this:

Again, this is 21st century America, if your man doesn't know how to hunt or fish, then all it means is that he doesn't know how to hunt and fish. Considering that the majority of America live in urban environments, I'm not sure how it is accurate to say that any man without these skills is really a woman. (What does it mean to be a woman anyway?)

Or this:

This one goes beyond gender stereotypes and reaches into homosexual stereotypes. Can only gay men comment on a woman's clothes? And if a straight man comments on a woman's clothes, why does it have to be assumed that he's really talking about her body? And should we really assume that all women don't say what they really mean? You should meet my sisters. When they want to say something, they say it. 

In sum, gender roles were created for a reason, but there is no longer any reason for them to still be so prevalent. Most past gender concepts have generally been turned into stereotypes. Yes, there are biological differences between men and woman. One has a penis, the other has a vulva. One produces sperm, the other produces eggs. There are hormonal differences. But as Dr. Lower made it clear in Psych 101, there are more differences within genders than between them. We should stop assuming that every man needs to be the same, and every woman needs to be the same. Does a male software programmer need masculinity? No. Does a female software programmer need femininity? No. In today's world, I think gender is irrelevant.

Works Cited:

Lehmiller, J. J. (2014). The Psychology of Human Sexuality.  West Sussex: John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Hiene, S. J. (2012). Cultural Psychology. New York: W. W. Norton and Company, Inc.